Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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