found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
