Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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