who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize