Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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