the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Randomize
