you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
