Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
