With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
