Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
