Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
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