don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
