Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
