I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
