ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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