If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Randomize