Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I will pee on everything he values.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
