My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
