We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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