Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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