every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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