he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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