Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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