i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
