one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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