btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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