Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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