Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
