so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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