My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
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