like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
All I want is dick and wine.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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