Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
not ubering you a puppy
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
