I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
you didnt know i had herpes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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