Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
