Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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