Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize