Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
