i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize