Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
