Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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