I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
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