problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
