The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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