I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize