The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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