My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Randomize
