you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
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We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
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I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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