Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
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