whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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