I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize
