I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I just blew my weed a kiss
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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